Does Your Child Struggle With Entitlement?
“Why haven’t we gone out for burgers yet? I asked you about it five weeks ago!”
I was stunned and dismayed by the display of rude entitlement from my child. In our world of relative wealth in the United States, our children have luxury at their fingertips. They don’t have to earn it and they didn’t work for it. But they get to enjoy it. With such easily accessible comfort, they are at high risk for believing they deserve it.
Parents, we must combat this default entitlement. But how?
By responding rather than reacting. “Wow, I notice that you expect me to do what you want. And you’re angry that I haven’t. My job is to provide what you need. Your job is to earn what you want. I am glad to share my resources with kind children. I will intentionally withhold my resources from entitled children.”
We must discipline entitlement. “I need a break from you until you can treat me better. Go to your room and spend 15 minutes there. No screens.”
We must help our children to develop gratitude which grows out of the intentional practice of appreciation, purposeful scarcity, and hard work. “You’ll be welcome to come out and enjoy screens again after you make a list of 20 things your parents have done for you. I will consider helping you get what you want when I see you treating me well. I will intentionally withhold gifts when you mistreat me. Completing your chores with a good attitude will be evidence to me that you recognize that I work hard to provide for you.”
None of us can be consistently grateful without God’s grace. So we pray, “Lord, we all feel entitled to things we have not earned. We ask that You would grow in us a heart of humble appreciation, in Jesus’s name.
