Screen Deception: Does Your Child Lie About Screen Use?
Have you caught your child in a bold faced lie, shading the truth, or even just downplaying their digital behavior? Have you walked into a room and noticed them quickly closing down a web page, or turning off their screen? Are you worried about their online integrity?
My husband and I have experienced all of this and more with our own children. I myself am a recovering liar, still tempted to cover up my tracks in order to avoid getting into trouble. We all want our children to develop integrity. How can we aid them in the process?
Gently acknowledge the behavior by commenting on it. “Hmm, I notice that you just closed your screen when I walked into the room. I wonder why...”
Humility is God’s great weapon of warfare. While our natural human tendency is to focus on our children’s shortcomings, leading with humility is more effective. “Do you know that I’ve also hidden some of my own screen use? In fact, just recently I wanted to lie to my boss to avoid his disapproval when I was using my work computer for entertainment.” Humility lowers defensiveness and sets us up as our child’s ally rather than their enemy. It also ushers in God’s grace.
Empathy builds a bond with our child. Rather than berating them for their misbehavior we can acknowledge the difficulty in following rules. You might say, “Isn’t it so hard to be trustworthy with our screens? I experience temptation too”
Discipline corrects the behavior. “Trustworthy kids are welcome to use our family screens. Anyone who misuses the screen loses their access for the rest of the day. I need you to hand the screen to me now.”
Repentance makes a way to right the wrong. “If you apologize and tidy the living room, that will help me to see that you want to rebuild trust with me.”
Prayer accesses the power we lack in ourselves. “Would you pray with me? God we both struggle with our digital behavior. We confess to You and ask for Your help in becoming people of integrity. Please help us. In Jesus’s name. Amen.”
Which step would be most difficult for you? Comment below.
