Happiness: Is Your Family’s Screen Use Increasing or Decreasing Happiness?
Who decides how screens are managed under your roof?
Did you decide as parents, or does it feel like the decision has been made for you by your children, culture, or something else?
Are you content with your family’s screen management? The way we parents manage screens can increase or decrease our children’s happiness.
It would appear that in many homes, children are the ones making that decision for themselves and they are choosing to access digital entertainment on average over 5 hours every day. Screens are so effective at keeping our children entertained and out of our hair. Convincing children to come off screen usually results in an argument at the least, and for many an aggressive, angry standoff. So, understandably, many of us parents allow those digital hours to tick on by while we are knee deep in our own screen diversions.
Dear tired parents, as we are witnessing our children’s mental health deteriorating at a shocking rate, we must reconsider whether it is in fact worth entering into the screen conflict. Thankfully, we do not need to eliminate our children’s screen use, but if we want to protect their bodies, hearts and minds we must limit it. According to Dr. Jean Twenge, a psychologist and researcher, teens who are allowed some screen time with limits are better adjusted than those who are not allowed any screen time. Interestingly, teens who are not allowed any television are more likely to be unhappy than those who are allowed an excessive amount. Teens who are not allowed to engage in any texting or gaming report more unhappiness than those who are allowed to do a little texting and gaming (1).
The American Academy of Pediatrics has recommended a screen limit of 2 hours per day for individual digital entertainment. Dr. Twenge found that more than 1 hour of screen use per day begins to have a progressively negative impact on happiness and behavior. As the hours in front of digital devices accumulate, children tend to be less curious, more argumentative, and have higher levels of anxiety and depression (2).
My husband and I have experimented with a range of hours and have settled on 1.5 hours of individual digital entertainment with enriching or neutral content He has a tendency to allow too much screen time while I am more likely to over limit screen time. This compromise protects our parental sanity, honors our differences as parents, and allows our children a good amount of curated digital fun. Some days we allow more than 1.5 hours and other days we have less time on screen. Our goal is to be flexible with the desires of all of our family members while allowing research, common sense, personal preference, and God’s guidance through prayer to influence our decision making.
After reading this article, are you feeling inclined to re-evaluate your family’s screen use?
For more practical tips about how to begin implementing limits, take a look at our book, Understanding and Loving Your Child in a Screen Saturated World, written with Steve Arterburn. https://amzn.to/3O10Vy7
References:
Twenge, J. (2022). What We Now Know About Screen Time for Kids. Deseret News. https://www.deseret.com/2022/3/7/22965534/what-we-know-now-about-screen-time-for-kids-jean-twenge-igen-social-media
Twenge, J. M., & Campbell, W. K. (2018). Associations between screen time and lower psychological well-being among children and adolescents: Evidence from a population-based study. Preventive medicine reports, 12, 271–283. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.pmedr.2018.10.003
